No More Joyrides

Let me preface this story with Eric's breaks are VERY SENSITIVE.

So, had a hankerin' for some pancakes and asked Eric if he wanted to head out to Goldmans for breakfast.  I then remembered that his car wasn't working right but he said "No problem, just switch the seat over so you can drive, I'll sit in the passengers side."  Sounds easy enough and it was until the ride back.

Here we were going along chatting when I notice the light start to turn yellow. Safety first - better not run it I thought. When all of a sudden the brakes lock up, the car starts squealing as if we've attained DEFCON 1 status.  Just as I look down to see what the hell happened there's goes Eric - into the windshield. "Holy Shit! Are you OK?" I said pushing him back up.  "Yeah, Yeah." Eric said bravely with a tinge of dazed. After checking him out to see if he was in one piece and unlocking the car from it's freeze frame status, we slowly move on.

"You scared the crap out of me"  I said.

"You should have seen the guy's face in the taxi next to us"  Eric said.

We get back to the house and both of us shaken, I look at my friend trying to examine him for any physical and/or mental damage.  

"Uh, would you like some Advil?"  this was as ridiculous as it sounded

"Sure, that would be good."  his verbal skills still in tact

"I am sooooo sorry. I can't believe that happened." me still in shock

"Well, I was saying I needed more excitement in my life" Eric said

"Were you really looking for that type of excitement?" 

"Uh, no."

Amazingly, there was no blood, no scratches, no bruises.  Apologizing profusely, he absolved me of my guilt as he said he should have known better and put on a seatbelt. I gave Eric some space to collect himself and took my guilt ridden self to my room then promptly called Cricket for a "I just almost killed Eric" talk. She being the good friend that she is, calmed me and followed it up with a Penny I once broke Eric's foot talk.  

Ah, yes, the infamous Cricket and Eric evening out at the Bottlecap Saloon where both good friends had a little too much to drink. Cricket sitting on top of Eric's lap gave her best imitation of Titanic's "I'm the King of the World!" when her butt hit his controls and drove them both directly into a wall. 

I went in to see if he was ok.  His bodyworker came by to check him out and massage out any possible aches.  

"Well, what's the prognosis?" I timidly asked

"Well..." he said somberly "She said I'll never walk again."

I gave him a wide-eyed look and then we both laughed. Wit DEFINITELY still in tact. 

We still love Goldman's.  This is the second accident for Eric on his way out there to which I think he should get a free year's worth of bagels.  We did come up with a slogan for them based on their t-shirts:

"Come meet me at Goldmans.  If you dare....."